Nerds!

As much as we probably all admit to being way too cool to ever be considered one – we all have a soft side for them.

But who are your favourite nerds?

While in real life – Bill Gates would probably rank right up there – on the small screen at least I’ve compiled my own list of personal favourites. . . . so without fanfare (and in no particular order) my Top 10 nerds from TV are:

Gilligan (from Gillgans Island)

Milhouse (from The Simpsons)

Fez (from The 70’s Show)

Monk (from Monk)

Pottsie (from Happy Days)

Cliff Claven (from Cheers)

Arnold Horshack (from Welcome Back Kotter)

Gomer Pile (from Gomer Pile USMC)

Brains (from The Thunderbirds)

Hiro (from Heroes)

Would love to hear yours.

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60’s and 70’s television culture – does it get any better?

Let’s face it – cheese sells. How else do you account for season after season of The Munsters – or Lost in Space.

How in today’s currency could you even contemplate running series after series of The Brady Bunch or put up with the escapades of McHales Navy or Hogan’s Heroes?

No – we’re talking classic television with a capital C. From The Addams Family to the Partridge Family – there’s little doubt that we’re smitten with a heady mix of both pop culture and nostalgia. Who could forget (or forgive Sally Field for her exuburence in) Gidget or The Flying Nun.

Will we ever get over such truly memorable television series as My Three Sons, Leave It to Beaver or Pettycoat Junction? And don’t forget the 70’s – CHiP’s with Ponch and John, Happy Days with Richie, Fonzie and the Gang, Laverne and Shirley or that stomping ground of the stars – Welcome Back Kotter, complete with one – John Travolta as Vinnie Barbarino.

Perhaps Julia or Room 222 was more your go or perhaps you’ve a soft spot for young Buffy and Jody or their sibling “Sissy” in the highly inappropriate and politically incorrectly titled – A Family Affair.

Long and short of it is that these days you can go to almost any video store and hire the boxed set of Dukes of Hazard, I Dream of Jeanie or Lost In Space and not feel the worse for taking it home and indulging in a little ME time

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‘The sirens are screaming and the fires are howling

Way down in the valley tonight . . . ‘

Could it be that the unmistakable melodic prose of Jim Steinman mixed with the bombastic style of one Marvin Lee Aday – better known to us all as ‘Meatloaf’ – afforded the world one of the greatest rock albums (commercially at least) that we’re ever likely to see?

Bat Out Of Hell (released in 1977) surely resides in either the mind or collection of every music lover – regardless of genre.

Still selling an estimated 200,000 copies each year, we know there’s at least 40 million fans out there who have willingly parted with their ‘hard-earned’ just so they can recount the delights of what Rolling Stone rated in its Top 500 Albums of all Time.

In fact it’s only one of two albums that have never actually exited the top 200 in the UK charts.

Facts aside – the album cover alone is a frame-able piece of pop art –
while culturally it is probably best remembered for the rock operetta “Paradise by the Dashboard Light.”

Without doubt the most thesponian and spectacularly dynamic piece on the album, it features wailing vocals extravagances and what reviewer Steve Gdula penned as being a “testosterone-crazed tenor in an incremental game of sexual bargaining with the resistant, but willing, Ellen Foley.

“By employing exaggerated power chords, screaming vocals, over-the-top arrangements, and a sense of rock & roll as Broadway theater, Bat made Meat Loaf a star. “

One thing is certain – Bat Out Of Hell provided an Everest for both Steinman and ‘Meat’ – a summit that they’ve never quite managed to reach since.

Collectively though – we – their musical Sherpa’s will continue to delight in the achievement.

I think somebody somewhere must be tolling a bell . . .

Click here to listen to Bat Out of Hell

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You know how it is!

In an effort to unfurl life’s oyster, you happen to chance on the two-year-old whose only purpose in life is to annoy you by repeating the word ‘Why”.

“It’s time for bed”

“why”

“Because otherwise you’ll be tired”

“why”

“Becuase your body needs rest”

“why”.

“So it can grow up strong and healthy”

“why”

You get the picture.

Anyway it occurred to me that adults can be just as annoying – so I started to heat seek as many ways to annoy people as possible.

If you have any more feel free to join the forum – or worse still would like to employ the tactics, just feel free.

1. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of “Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip…”
2. Speak only in a “robot” voice.
3. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.
4. Make appointments for September 31.
5. Sniffle incessantly.
6. Leave your turn signal on.
7. Name your dog “Dog.”
8. Reply to everything someone says with “that’s what YOU think.”
9. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your “astronaut training.”
10. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a “real hoot.”
11. Practice making fax and modem noises.
12. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
13. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
14. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you’ll be saying more any moment.
15. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.
16. Call out random numbers while someone is counting.
17. Sew anti-theft detector strips into peoples backpacks.
18. Set alarms for random times.
19. Honk and wave to strangers.
20. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.

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“Rock ‘n roll’s been going downhill ever since Buddy Holly died.”

Hardly the definitive piece of historic movie dialogue but  . . .  salient in it’s context none-the-less.

. . . Happy Days, Grease, Sha-na-na, Laverne and Shirley, Back to The Future Part 1 . . .  there’s little doubt that for the latter part of the 70’s, we were collectively captivated with the romance of the 1950’s.

Strangely enough though – it was a movie set in the 60’s which is uniformly acknowledged as the catalyst for the fervour which swept up most of English speaking world.

Click Here to Watch Trailer

American Graffiti – starring a young Richard Dreyfuss, Ron Howard, Cindy Williams, Mackenzie Phillips, Suzanne Sommers Harrison Ford, Joe Spano and Charles Martin Smith – to name just a few – recreated the feel, landscape, and sounds of early 60s, in small-town America – an historical time period (of JFK’s Presidency and the New Frontier before the jarring assassination of late 1963).

Advertising posters and theatrical trailers for the film asked: “Where were you in ’62? . . . yet strangely enough the film (by Star Wars director – George Lucas – is credited with birthing the 50’s TV and film phenonomen.

Admittedly there were over 300 pre-1962 cars used in the 1973 film and the soundtrack featured an absolute fistful of songs harking back to the likes of Bill Haley and Comets with Rock Around the Clock, Johnny B. Goode by Chuck Berry and the Buddy Holly classic – That’ll be The Day.

But perhaps a less tangible (but very real) reason behind the film’s success (which was produced in just 28 days) is the measurable feel for a seemingly more innocent time – when cool music, hot cars, tough guys and cute chicks were the order of the day.

Of course this wasn’t lost on film and television producers either – and with the 60’s a little too reviled (and recent) in people’s minds – then the 50’s backdrop proved the perfect formula.

And so the era was re-birthed – Hollywood style.

It goes without saying that many of the film’s stars went on to receiving regular pay cheques, appearing in hit TV sitcoms such as Happy Days, Laverne and Shirley, One Day at a Time, Three’s Company and Hill Street Blues.

And although the film was nominated for five Academy Awards including Best Picture, Best Supporting Actress, Best Director, Best Original Screenplay, and Best Film Editing, it came away empty-handed.

In the words of Fats Domino – Ain’t That A Shame.

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There’s nothing that really needs saying other than check this out – it’s a little freaky!

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Ya know – there are annoying songs, truly awful songs and then there are just plain – ‘you’re messin’ with my mind’ songs – that we just can’t stomach.

Trouble is of course – that collectively we would never hear these through mainstream sources such as radio – if they didn’t at least have a modicum of support.

For example – if I never heard – “My Heart Will Go On” from Celine Dion, “Shiny Happy People” from REM or “Tainted Love” from Soft Cell – it would be too soon.

Of course novelty songs such as ‘Day Trip to Bangor”, “Convoy” or “Disco Duck” don’t really count – but I suspect that’s another post altogether.

So what songs could you live without ever hearing again?

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